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During his visit to HITS HQ, Warner/Chappell's Greg Sowders demonstrates the concept of phase cancellation, whereby standing in a precise spot between two Jews cancels out the exhausting effects of their respective neuroses. Later, Editor in Chief Lenny Beer smoked almost enough weed to grasp the science, while The MGMT Company's Marc Pollack asked himself the eternal question, "How do I make this more about me?"

SPOTIFY Q1 PROFIT TOPS $1B; SUBS HIT 239M
How Swede it is. (4/23a)
HITS LIST IN
PLAYOFF MODE
Will scoring records be broken this week? (4/23a)
THE COUNT: ALL THE DESERT'S A STAGE
The dust settles on the Indio Polo Grounds. (4/22a)
ROCK HALL UNVEILS
2024 INDUCTEES
Class of '24 comes alive. (4/22a)
TOP 20: TAYLOR TIME
Is it ever. (4/23a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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