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MAMMA MIA, WHAT
A HITS LIST

Ariana Grande, Weezer channeling Toto, ABBA and Arnold Schoenberg, creator of the 12 Tone method of musical composition (also known as dodecaphony—look it up), provide the eclectic soundtrack for this week’s star-studded episode of Let’s Make a Deal: Music Biz Edition (aka HITS List) Without further ado, let's meet the contestants...

TORTURED POETS UNITE: TAYLOR IS BACK
Is she ever. (4/19a)
HITS LIST ENTERS
PLAYOFF MODE
Will the scoring record be broken? (4/19a)
SONG REVENUE: CALM BEFORE THE STORM
J. Cole has his moment; Future-Metro have another big payday. (4/19a)
WARNER CHAPPELL ROPES IN RED CLAY STRAYS
Another big get for Guy and Carianne (4/19a)
THE COUNT: COACHELLA, FROM THE COUCH
The coziest way to experience the fest (4/19a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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