WHY? BECAUSE WE LIKE THEM

Somewhere behind a secret passageway in the cavernous recesses of a major amusement park, Disney Music Group boss Ken Bunt, Promo head Scot Finck and associates undergo a solemn ritual commemorating their 20-year anniversaries at the company. "Huh-huh, Ken, you're a heckuva fine leader," chuckled Disney's Big Cheese. "And Scotty, huh-huh, I need those spins upped in Denver, buddy, chop-chop. And now, on to the feats of strength!"

Note: There were no feats of strength, Mickey didn't grind Scot about airplay and in no way is an attorney standing over us as we type this.

BACK TO RUMOR MILL

		NEAR TRUTHS: CENTERS OF GRAVITY Eilish enters a powerful new creative chapter. (5/6a) Check It Out Now ON THE COVER: TAYLOR SWIFT Sorry, Tay, but we had to do it. (5/6a) Check It Out Now HITS LIST: HANGIN' OUT With extra relish (5/6a) Check It Out Now LATEST SCORES: KENDRICK V. DRAKE Multiple lead changes in this playoff game. (5/6a) Check It Out Now LIVE NATION POSTS (ANOTHER) RECORD QUARTER More butts in seats than ever before. (5/3a) Check It Out Now
		THE NEW UMG Gosh, we hope there are more press releases. TIKTOK BANNED! Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is. THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT No, not that one. TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST Now 100% unlicensed!

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WHY? BECAUSE WE LIKE THEM

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