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 BRITS LIST

Team WMG was well represented at the BRIT Awards as these handsome photographs amply demonstrate. Scroll for the droll.

“What would you like to drink?” Head of Recorded Music Max Lousada asks CEO Robert Kyncl. “I’ll flag down a waiter.” “No need,” replied Kyncl. “I’ve programmed a drone to bring us a tray of negronis.” Later, ChatGPT offered to write much funnier captions.


Parlophone Co-Presidents Mark Mitchell (l) and Nick Burgess flank artist Sam Ryder, who appears to be running for U.S. president circa 1972.


The following people have consumed enough liquor to help them forget where this photo is running: Warner Chappell U.K. Managing Director/Head of International A&R Shani Gonzales, WCM U.K. Head of A&R Amber Davis, Senior International A&R Manager Sam Lowe and One House Management’s Callum Reese.

BRITs Chair and Atlantic U.K. Managing Director and President of Promotions Damian Christian and Sarah Christian continued their campaign to bring back the Viennese waltz.

NEAR TRUTHS: ALL THE RIGHT MOVES
Checkmate (5/31a)
HITS LIST: EYES ON THE PRIZE
Final exams (5/31a)
SONG REVENUE: BILLIE BREAKS THE BANK
10 for 10 (5/31a)
SHADY'S BACK—TELL A FRIEND
When we need him most (5/31a)
WHAT’S HEATING UP AS SUMMER NEARS?
The future's so hot, they gotta wear shades. (5/31a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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