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WHAT ARE YOU GETTING US FOR OUR ANNIVERSARY?

The year was 1986. The kids were rocking out to [checks notes], huh, Kate Bush and Metallica. And a saucy, irreverent, wacky, nutty and sporadically proofread music tip sheet emerged from the twisted minds of two biz insiders.

They called it HITS. Some said this was because of the founders’ conviction that hit songs were the indispensable fuel of the biz. Others believed it was simply an anagram for “SHIT.” Both hypotheses are credible.

Oddly enough, through boom and bust, CDs and downloads, file-sharing and wardrobe malfunctions, Spotifys and TikToks, HITS persisted.

We owe our survival (which has been likened to that of cockroaches after a nuclear war more times than we’d care to admit) to you, gentle reader. We look forward to expressing our gratitude in the customary way—by producing a tree-killing doorstop crammed with dumb jokes, aka the HITS Anniversary Special.

What will be in this issue? Hard to say as we’re usually in a blackout when it’s compiled. Expect lots of shiny photos of industry peeps, nostalgic nuggets from the archives and more to fill the white space between ads. Or something.

OK, onward to 37, whether you like it or not. Probably not.

HITS LIST BLASTS OFF
Space is the place for Tay. (4/26a)
SONG STREAMS: SWIFT SETS STREAMING RECORD
What did you expect? (4/26a)
SPRING BREAKOUTS: THESE HEATERS ARE STILL HOT
Who's Boomin who. (4/26a)
SONG REVENUE: “SWEET” SMELLS OF SUCCESS
Life after "Church" (4/26a)
STAGECOACH: SETS TO SEE AND PLACES TO BE
Saddle up, cowboys and cowgirls. (4/26a)
THE NEW UMG
Gosh, we hope there are more press releases.
TIKTOK BANNED!
Unless the Senate manages to make this whole thing go away, that is.
THE NEW HUGE COUNTRY ACT
No, not that one.
TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN PLAYLIST
Now 100% unlicensed!
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